‘Almost in spite of himself, (the godless poet, Philip
Larkin) recognised that ‘the ghostly silt’* of a church can exercise a strange
power over those who visit it. Silt is
the perfect word. It suggests the slow
accumulation of pain and regret, and their distillation into memory and
mercy. Because they have heard it all,
these serious houses on serious earth.
Into their ‘blent air’* generations of the wretched have whispered their
compulsions, and not always in the hope of having them removed, but simply to
experience the relief of naming them. Churches
not only bear the memory of our dyings, they also carry the knowledge of the
helplessness of our failings. They are a
haven for the homeless woman whose destitution is obvious, muttering to herself
over there in the back pew; but they also accept the moral destitution of the
confident man sitting in the dark chapel, gazing at the white star of the
sanctuary lamp, heavy with the knowledge of the compulsions that have dominated
his life and refuse to leave him. Here
both are accepted in their helplessness.
There is no reproach. Churches do
not speak; they listen. (...) They understand helplessness and
the weariness of failure, and have for centuries absorbed them into the mercy
of their silence. This is grace. Unearned undeserved unconditional acceptance
of unchanging failure, including biological failure, our last failure, our
dying. The unclosed church is the home of
the destitute and the dead. And since we
will go on failing and dying, some of us will go on gravitating to those places
that do not shut themselves against our need.’
* from Larkin’s poem Church
Going
- from ‘Leaving
Alexandria. A Memoir of Faith and Doubt’
by Richard Holloway. p. 253
2 comments:
This is beautiful and powerful - and true. Thank you for sharing it.
(Mind you, I've been known to mutter to myself in the back pew)
I have always found the words of the hymn 'In our day of thanksgiving' equally moving; These stones that have echoed thy praises are holy, and dear in thy sight are the feet that once trod....'
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